Goal Gol Anda gol

London :


Since Venky's Chicken Poultry has bought Football Club Blackburn Rovers, sweeping changes have been the Norm.









Firstly the Manager of the Club had been sacked, Expensive Players such as Ronaldinho and Beckham were attempted to be transferred in, and now the most significant change has been seen.









The Club Management has altered all Contracts of Players to make them Celebrate Like Chickens after scoring each goal.

The Management has also decided to buy players with the Word 'Hen' in it , example , Henry, Henderson, Henrik Larsson etc.

 Lahore, Pakistan :


With the Constant price-rise of Indian Cricket players, The Government of India has decided that it would import Pakistani players to ease prices of Onion Cricket Players.

Sharad Pawar , India's Agriculture Cricket Minister has promised that the Import of these players would surely reduce the constant inflation of Player prices.

" I solemly swear to be India's Cricket minister "

The BJP kick started its nation wide Anti-Price rise rally in reference to the huge sum Franchisees had to pay for bare minimums such as players.

Arun Jaitley said  " The Govt. has failed, the PM must answer why Irfan Pathan Costs 9 Crores, this is not done."
 

The import of Pakistani players brings with them many new worries, such as costant eye watering due to loosening of the outer layer.

Captain Jairam

Lavasa, Pune :

The sudden improvement in India's Environment was a puzzle for most but Flogger India has uncovered the secret behind the ever improving Climate. It was a revelation to most when a Super Hero was sighted to have cleaned up the mess that is our Country's Environment.

This is a picture of Lavasa's transformation after the interference of the mysterious Super Hero.

Before

After

The secret is that Five Bureaucrats come together to summon this mysterious Super Hero.

The Name of this Super Hero is  CAPTAIN JAIRAM.

This reporter was told that the Captain's source of energy is solely his ambition to be in a better Cabinet position.

Poll of the weak !

People were asked if Gujjars should get quota protection ?

46 %  said no

17 %  said yes

15 %  said not sure

12 %  said that they hate gujaratis

9  %  said all males should have protection with them

1 %  said Jairam Ramesh

Poll of the weak !

People were asked who Rahul Gandhi should marry,

38 %  said he should marry Deepika Padukone

32 %  said Pamela Anderson

15 %   said Rakhi Sawant. 

14 %  said  " me, me, me"

1%    said Jairam Ramesh

 

 

Rupeeclair

New Delhi : With Banks all over the country facing a Micro money shortage the Reserve bank of India , fondly known as the Tijori of India ( not related to Deepak Tijori ) has formally given a Money package in the form of Cadbury Eclairs to several banks of the country

actual package sent to all banks

                                                  


Bank chiefs all over the country were astonished with this package the Govt. granted them, but the Finance Minister reassured them that the goods being sent were the new age exchange of money,


Finance Minister Pranab Mukherjee said  "Our ancestors exchanged coins & crops and gold & silver, our times have embarked upon a new means of exchange, the Eclair "



The stock markets were the first ones to capatalise on this new development by listing the new currency on the market

In other news, Cadbury and Nestle have posted a 200 times increase in profits for the 1st quarter of 2011.

New years Resolutions

Sharad Pawar : Make sure that Nephew Ajit Pawar's influence in the Party is reduced,


but not to the level that he would start his own MNS ( mayus nephew sena )






A .Raja : I must find a different career where people would appreciate me

Prithviraj Chavan : I must rid Maharashtra of all its Scams and punish the Corrupt

 

Rahul Gandhi : I must find a Bride but give Everyone an Equal Chance